i really, really try to always be honest. i hate lying. i do everything i can to avoid telling a fib while still being positive & uplifting. sometimes this can be very hard. i strain to find something true & complimentary to say. usually, i can come up with something good to focus on, because in most every thing there is at least an ounce of good. sometimes it's just impossible. in those cases i try to put a sunny spin on the painful truth. and you know what really irks me? when i go through all this effort trying to preserve someone's confidence & feelings & they continue to pester me with questions regarding the ugly truth i am trying to avoid. i feel like just screaming out how bad their situation is. but that just wouldn't be polite. so i bite my tongue. because it isn't my goal to go correcting everyone or pointing out their errors. no, it's my goal to make others feel good about the situation that they are in while giving them an ounce of constructive advice. because that's what truly matters. one time i was in a dilemma. my friend was in a hard situation & i didn't know what to tell her. my dad gave me some advice that has stuck with me ever since. he said, "ask yourself this before you say anything: is it honest? is it true? is it necessary?" so i try to let that be my guiding beacon in all conversation. and i hope that as my boys grow they can do the same. honest & positive. that's the key.